The Art Of Parenting
The criterion for being rich was different in my school: a child who had the most pen drives and hard disks filled with porn was considered the richest. Each of us would, every day, secretly download it. For those who didn’t have an excess of the internet would rush to cyber-cafes. My case was different. As I was the poorest as I didn’t have an excess of the internet, I wasn’t also allowed to go a cyber-cafe. My mother prohibited it.
Well, if you have a working mother, then except dialling the number of her office, you can be wealthy for some time; and in her absence, do things that you couldn’t do in her presence. As I couldn’t increase my wealth when she’d be home, I’d wait for her to leave me alone at home. As she’d lock her laptop with a password that was neither my birthday nor my father’s, I’d have to go for the television, but my father would only prefer news channels. For me, there was a set of educational channels and some cartoon channels.[I’d turn to a cartoon serial if my father would enter the room and I’m watching an advertisement of a lingerie.]
There’s a serial named as Sexology telecasted on the Discovery Channel which’s really a treat for me. They’d educate about human reproduction and every time they’d show an animated video of a man and a woman, my hands would slip inside my pants. I’d to keep the frequency of my moans low, as my mother’s room was next to mine. Moreover, my father would keep rushing into my room to see what I’m watching and what I’m doing, hence, I’d to be conscious even at the time of orgasm(I didn’t know its meaning that time.)
On days when there’s even no television, I’d to for newspapers and magazines. I was the daily reader of the column named as ICandy in i-Next where they’d display a model in a bikini. Later on, my father got a hint and he changed the newspaper to The Hindu. I’d heard him tell Pandit Ji to bring a newspaper with the least nudity.
In the midst of such serendipity, my parents were in naive.
They hadn’t seen the other side of mine. In contrary to it, they’d quote my example when it would come to innocence, as when we are watching a Hollywood movie together, I’d leave the room during a kiss scene. I’d been fooling my parents in the most successful sense of the phrase. In fact, everyone in my class would do. I was perhaps the most steadfast of all.
Surprisingly, the more strict our parents became, the more Not-For-Children-Things we did. The more they spied on us, the more we managed to hide. And somewhere, we would win. Maybe, because of the generation gap. If only they would have answered when for the first time those words slipped from her mouth, “What is s e x, Mumma?” “Shhh,” the reply had come. If they would have told it’s natural, we wouldn’t have fancied it so much at the back of her head that we’d see others do it on a day before an exam.
As I’m writing it and the clock seems to have been playing fizz-buzz, I’m sitting in front of my laptop, and there’s a Wifi connection in my home. There are a lot of emails with porn spammed by me. Even though I can watch it at any time freely, but I choose not to. I spend a lot of time away from my home and I can smoke and visit brothels like my friends do, but I don’t. Apart from the fact that there’s hardly any desperation left in me and I’ve a pen and a responsibility, I’ve learned one thing from my childhood experiences, but I’ll not tell you loudly, else I’ll hurt someone who I’m not supposed to.
Speaking very slowly: no matter how much obligations you put on your child or how much strict you are, you can never stop him from doing anything wrong except by being his best friend and showing your trust on him. Tell him that you have a faith in him and you know he won’t do anything wrong and he’d think of your confidence in him and not the slaps he’d get while doing anything you want him not to do. I assure you every child craves for being trusted. I too did.
~ ~ Ahmad